Thursday, February 12, 2026

diary entry 66

 i got so fucked up last night. from now on im not smoking weed anymore either because even lower quality strains are scaring me. i smoked some weed my aunt grew when my parents left yesterday and it made me paranoid and scared. i drank heavily and took a zyprexa to avoid the anxiety.

then while my parents were still out i managed to find the key to the rents room and i got some hydrocodone (20mg total) and  0.5mg xanax. i was drunk as fuck too but i took both and felt so euphoric and lovely. apparently i mightve blacked out at one point though because my mom said i ate the italian food for me she brought home but i have 0 memory of that. i woke up afterglowing today

oh my god sorry i was typing this out then got distracted and made a meme but il finish now


 anyways i woke up and my left knee was fucking busted it hurts to move and walk and bend it IDFK why. whatever

i woke up and showered and brushed  my teeth and had therapy. it was a decent appointment and she was cool. then i applied to a few jobs, including walmart (walmart made me do the fucking assessment twice smh) and emailed a possible psychiatrist because im Not seeing the other one anymore.

someone whos going to FCL added me from bluesky and told me i could room with him, but to reserve it i need to send $250 and i only got $15. but i told him im on unemployment and looking for a new job so. lets see if that works out. im like What if its a scam. But whatever

my mom went out im hoping she picks up my meds ive been out of mirtazapine for a few days 

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