six sevennnnn i'm such a fat fucking chud
Anyways today i went out with my mom! we got chocolate from the chocolate place and i picked up my T (!!!) and i got my hair cut and we got groceries! got my undercut redone and my hair is much shorter now.
we got pizza place takeout but i got home nauseous and ate only a little bit before barfing. i also took my meds right before throwing up so i had to retake them.
im moving my T shot days to fridays, because on tuesday i only did 0.1ml but tonight i was able to do 0.3.
i got some booze. i challenged myself not to drink yesterday and it was hard but i did it. i got 2 12% ABV wine cooler things. i drank one after throwing up
i'm starting to miss F again. i almost cried over him again. i'm scared. i'm nervous. i'm not feeling good. idk it's been almost 1.5 years and i have 2 new "partners" one being one i know irl but it's still. hard. my body my cells my brain my phone my everything is a museum of everything F loved, hated, laughed at, time shared together, sleeping during VCs, memories, and plane tickets. it hurts so fucking bad. idk what to do
i applied to more jobs
yea
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